Hoover: Difference between revisions
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''"With friends like these, who needs enemies."'' |
''"With friends like these, who needs enemies."'' |
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A '''Hoover''' is a person (often a woman, can be a guy) who |
A '''Hoover''' is a narcissistic person (often a woman, can be a guy) who becomes trigger during (or after) a breakup and wants to remain close to their former lover.[https://shrink4men.com/2020/03/25/hoover-tactics-used-by-narcissists-and-borderlines-during-and-after-a-break-up/|1] While it is possible to end on good terms with someone you date, a Hoover is someone that you tend to end on bad terms with. |
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The name Hoover is in reference to a famous vacuum cleaner brand. These narcissist are rather good at '''sucking''' a former lover back into a relationship. |
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=== Causes === |
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Narcissism is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one's idealized self image and attributes.[https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcissism|2] Narcissist don't like to feel vulnerable or lonely, and the prospect of being out of a relationship scares them. Wanting to avoid feeling vulnerable, they will attempt to re-enter a relationship. Often this is days or weeks after a break-up, but it can occur years after a relationship. |
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Hoovers can be the ones who break up the relationship, but is more likely their partner has. A Hoover will generally do what they can to keep a relationship going, even beyond the point it should. It might even be apparent to a hoover that the relationship should end, but they will refuse to do so. If their lover does manage to end things, they will try to rekindle the relationship through a series of manipulations. |
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===Five Fears=== |
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The actions of a hoover ('''hoovering''') is caused by primitive psychological fears that existed long before the break-up occurred. Their fears are centered on one (or all) of five fears: |
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<li>The fear of “abandonment.”</li> |
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<li>Loss of control over others.</li> |
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<li>Loss of resources (e.g., money, social status).</li> |
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<li>Feeling or appearing inferior or inadequate.</li> |
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<li>Public exposure.</li> |
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</ol> |
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== Links == |
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[[Category:Featured Articles]] |
[[Category:Featured Articles]] |
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Revision as of 00:56, 18 April 2020
"With friends like these, who needs enemies."
A Hoover is a narcissistic person (often a woman, can be a guy) who becomes trigger during (or after) a breakup and wants to remain close to their former lover.[1] While it is possible to end on good terms with someone you date, a Hoover is someone that you tend to end on bad terms with.
The name Hoover is in reference to a famous vacuum cleaner brand. These narcissist are rather good at sucking a former lover back into a relationship.
Causes
Narcissism is the pursuit of gratification from vanity or egotistic admiration of one's idealized self image and attributes.[2] Narcissist don't like to feel vulnerable or lonely, and the prospect of being out of a relationship scares them. Wanting to avoid feeling vulnerable, they will attempt to re-enter a relationship. Often this is days or weeks after a break-up, but it can occur years after a relationship.
Hoovers can be the ones who break up the relationship, but is more likely their partner has. A Hoover will generally do what they can to keep a relationship going, even beyond the point it should. It might even be apparent to a hoover that the relationship should end, but they will refuse to do so. If their lover does manage to end things, they will try to rekindle the relationship through a series of manipulations.
Five Fears
The actions of a hoover (hoovering) is caused by primitive psychological fears that existed long before the break-up occurred. Their fears are centered on one (or all) of five fears:
- The fear of “abandonment.”
- Loss of control over others.
- Loss of resources (e.g., money, social status).
- Feeling or appearing inferior or inadequate.
- Public exposure.